They Walk Among Us

Want to share a good joke? Post it here. No offensive jokes, please.

Moderator: Moderators

Postby lenslover2003 » Aug 22, 2007 2:18 pm

Well,I had to post this one,as it fits right in. This story comes from my best friend. He stopped into a large outdoor/sporting goods store,to look for boots. A young sales clerk asks him " Can I help you?" He says, " Yes,I am looking for a good pair of hiking boots." She then replies, " What are going to use them for?" I think our woods are in trouble......
Blessed are the cracked......for they shall let in the light.......
lenslover2003
Frequent Poster
 
Posts: 80
Joined: Nov 28, 2005 6:36 pm
Location: Rapid City, SD
  

Postby incavenow » Aug 30, 2007 9:48 pm

I can't resist..one of our fellow chatters here, very recently posted they would be easy to find at OTR. They would be the drunk person...Come on! Is that gonna make you stand out from the crowd? No malice intended here..that should make me easy to find at TAG also!
:toast:
User avatar
incavenow
Prolific Poster
 
Posts: 151
Joined: May 9, 2007 6:09 pm
Location: LaFayette, Georgia
Name: Jeff Hudson
NSS #: 38762
  

Re: They Walk Among Us

Postby NZcaver » Jan 18, 2008 10:25 pm

Much as I dislike receiving email forwards, I thought this one was actually pretty funny. It reminded me of this thread, so here you go...

Be Careful Out There...

We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two..'

We haven't used Sears repair since.


My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back.' She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but they could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back$1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.


I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

From Kingman , KS.


My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.' He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.

From Kansas City


I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded,
'That's why we ask.'

Happened in Birmingham, Ala.


The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS


At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.


I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.


When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'its open!' His reply, 'I know. I already got that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , Mississippi


They walk among us...
User avatar
NZcaver
Global Moderator
 
Posts: 6295
Joined: Sep 7, 2005 2:05 am
Location: Anchorage, Alaska
Name: Jansen
NSS #: 50665RL
Primary Grotto Affiliation: CCG
  

Re: They Walk Among Us

Postby saraleoni » Dec 29, 2008 1:58 am

One question a lot of the dinner cruise workers in Hawai'i have heard is: "How many times a day do you do the sunset cruise?"
Another one: "Is there water on the other side of the island?"
Some tourists also want to know when the bridge from the mainland will be finished.

And some caving specific ones:
My Mom wasn't sure if you could go caving when it was raining.
The sister of a member of a group I was going with one evening was surprised to here she was going caving after dark.
saraleoni
Occasional Poster
 
Posts: 30
Joined: Dec 8, 2008 9:12 am
  

Re: They Walk Among Us

Postby Teresa » Dec 29, 2008 10:00 am

saraleoni wrote:And some caving specific ones:
My Mom wasn't sure if you could go caving when it was raining.


Listen to your mom, saraleoni. There are many caves which become deathtraps if you enter them while it is raining above. Drowning is one of the leading causes of cave fatality, and the drowning is often due to the caves becoming flash flooded because of rain. :cave softly:
Teresa
NSS Hall Of Fame Poster
 
Posts: 1413
Joined: Dec 31, 2005 9:06 pm
  

Re: They Walk Among Us

Postby saraleoni » Dec 30, 2008 1:51 am

Yeah, I know. But I think she was asking about going to Ruby Falls. Nor was it really raining, more like heavy mist. Being a new caver myself, I only go in caves with people I trust. Although, as this topic is proving, no one is infallible.
saraleoni
Occasional Poster
 
Posts: 30
Joined: Dec 8, 2008 9:12 am
  

Previous

Return to Joke Forum

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users