Page 1 of 1

My wife!

PostPosted: Oct 25, 2012 8:00 pm
by harrym
My wife has been missing for 2 weeks now.

The police came to my house today and told me to prepare for the worst.

So.... I went to Goodwill and bought back all of my wife's clothes.

:waving:

Re: My wife!

PostPosted: Oct 25, 2012 8:03 pm
by harrym
My wife disappeared in a kayaking accident last week in Anchorage.

Today, two Alaska State Troopers showed up at my door.

"We're sorry Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife."

"Tell me, please! Did you find her?" I cried.

The troopers looked at each other. One said, "We have some bad news, some good news, and some really great news. Which do you want to hear first?"

Fearing the worst, I said, "Give me the bad news first."

The trooper said, "I'm sorry to tell you, sir, but this morning we found your wife's body in Kachemak Bay..."

"Oh my God! Well, what's the good news?"

The trooper continued, "When we pulled her up, she had twelve 25-lb. King crabs and six good-size Dungeness crabs clinging to her and we feel you are entitled to a share in the catch."

"If that's the good news, what's the great news?"

The trooper said, "We're going to pull her up again tomorrow.."

Re: My wife!

PostPosted: Oct 26, 2012 5:11 am
by harrym
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.

She said, ‘I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds.’

So I bought her a bathroom scale.

Re: My wife!

PostPosted: Oct 26, 2012 5:13 am
by harrym
My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last.

Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food...

She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

Re: My wife!

PostPosted: Oct 26, 2012 5:14 am
by harrym
My wife was mugged and had her credit cards stolen.

I'm not going to call the police 'cause the thief spends less than my wife did.